The term ‘Nice guys finish last’ is 100% true. Remember our article a few months ago about this topic? If you don’t, we’ll leave you a link at the end. In this article, we discuss why men fall victim to toxic women; how to regain control in a relationship, and start saying NO more often.
If you’ve read our previous articles, you would understand that most women are addicted to pampering. Perhaps it’s Disney’s fault, who knows? Today, many women act and feel entitled because men do exactly what they want. A lot of men these days put beautiful women on a pedestal, treating them like a goddess when in reality women, deep down, just want to be treated as normal human beings.
Where Do We Draw The Line?
First, men need to understand that women eventually get sick of men who idolize them. It’s true. Although they never say it, women are not fully committed to men who do what they ask, on-demand without question. Remember, always trust women’s actions, not their words. Now, it’s okay to show your woman the world, as a gentleman. But it becomes a deluded practice to pedestalize women and reject the reality that they are indeed individuals, who have thoughts and feelings of their own.
Second, reality always wins. Men are vested in the societal myth that they are physically and emotionally inferior when it comes to women. In other words, masculinity is often ridiculed. And because of this ideology, men often treat women as ‘items’ or ‘jewels’ that must be protected, to feel better about their own manhood. This is unrealistic; relationships founded on this premise almost always collapse. Unfortunately, this is the sort of fantasy toxic women (not all, see below) love to indulge in.
Good women who are down-to-earth, on the other hand, hate being treated better than they deserve. They hate nice guys. This is true because what most women want is a ‘real man who enforces his own standards over her imaginative child-like principles.
Reasons Why Women Hate Nice Guys
Chivalry in the 21st century is dead, here’s why:
It Puts Pressure on Her
Being placed on a pedestal puts a lot of emotional pressure on the woman. Why, because she’s forced to become something she isn’t; forced to hide her flaws to fulfill your fantasies of her. Facades like these never last long.
She Craves Genuine Connection
It’s not enjoyable for a woman when you’re in love with fantasy instead of the real ‘her’. When you place a woman on a pedestal, you interact with an image you created of her. For a woman to feel loved, she needs to feel seen, appreciated and validated for the individual she truly is.
She Doubts Your Competence
Women want to date men who are smart, socially savvy, and self-aware. How then do you expect such a woman to trust your competence when you can’t even see beyond your fantasies? She needs your emotional self-awareness to assess who she truly is, and not the goddess you see her as.
Her Desire For Hypergamy
Women date men majorly for selfish reasons. They want a guy who is better than them; a guy who inspires them. They hate ‘simps’. Putting her on a pedestal only belittles your masculinity, and she will never truly respect you for idolizing her. You must be the prize, not her wrapping paper.
Why Nice Guys Finish Last
The problem with nice guys is that they think a woman will stay if they keep doing everything they’re told to do. So they keep buying gifts, taking them on expensive trips; all the while tolerating their toxic and petulant attitudes. Then these men get dumped and sit and wonder, “What did I do wrong?”
You overvalued that woman.
The only time you should do something for any woman is when she has earned it; if she is putting the time and energy in; if she is reciprocating the things you do for her. Relationships are a two-way street; the second you take on all the responsibility, the less control you have.
You see, most women feel entitled to the good things. They spend a lot of their time finding these plot holes where they manipulate you into paying their bills and stuff. Once you become that nice guy who does whatever she asks, she’ll keep asking for more and more until you can no longer provide. Then she’ll leave you for someone else.
She’s not a goddess. Stamp your feet, set your standards. Why would you prioritize a lady’s happiness over yours? It’s mental; she probably thinks you’re sick for doing these things too because she knows she doesn’t deserve it. If you stop making her comfortable and stop being the ‘Yes ma’am’ type guy, you regain control.
Stop being the nice guy, because of sex. Sex is nothing. Remember, men are the gatekeepers of relationships. Women are the gatekeepers of sex. Stop being a ‘simp’ and start being a man. Make that woman work to earn your loyalty.
The Power of Telling Women ‘NO’
Every man must be able to tell a woman ‘NO’ or it will end badly for you. If you give most women an inch, they will take it a whole mile. When you start compromising your beliefs, your manhood to satisfy a woman’s cravings, you fall into her control. And when that happens, she will never value you. You will become the nice guy who ‘takes care of things for her; not the guy she needs.
Tell her NO. It’s not only effective, but it also shows self-respect and worth.
Most men cannot tell a woman ‘no’. Why, because they are so mesmerized by their woman’s curves and beauty that they go dumb just to slush in one more time. Most attractive women are always in situations where they can make men do whatever they want. They become used to it and expect every guy they date to ‘simp ‘for them.
Well, this is how you stand out. You say NO. Because when you do, she’ll take a moment to reflect on this refusal. She’ll think, “Well, no one’s ever told me no before.” She may get upset for a while, but eventually, she’ll get used to it; because deep down, she needs a man who can take leadership. And if she cannot handle your rejection, then she isn’t the right woman for you. You dodge a bullet because these types of women cannot keep a relationship.
Sometimes, saying NO allows the woman to chase you, not the other way around. Don’t be afraid to offend any woman; they can handle it. Never compromise your masculinity as a man just to make women comfortable. Respect your personal values; put your feet down, and set your standards. A woman will respect you ten times more for being true to yourself.
Check out our Good Guys vs Bad Boys article here.
Modern Man Advice